So.... I don't know much about NBT, but you could write a simple skript like this

Code (Skript):

1. on break:
2.     if player's tool is a diamond pickaxe:
3.         if lore of player's tool contains "your lore here":
4.             if event-block is not sponge:
5.                 cancel event
6.                 send "some message about not being able to break blocks"

I suggest using LORE because a player can easily change the name of a tool in game and mess up this system

As for the placing, very similar

Code (Skript):

1. on place of sponge:
2.     if lore of player's tool contains "lore of your sponge here":
3.         if targeted block is not (whatever block you want the sponge to be placed on):
4.             cancel event
5.             send "some message about not being able to place sponges here"

I dont think this is really the BEST answer.... but this will give you some insight on some simple solution to fix this issue